i had to leap up before i hit the floor

Spring Quarter always eats me alive. This past week, I found some down time to talk with Lorraine about things-- random things, recruitment, spop, anything and everything but that which we always talk about. I've been seeing less and less of her and a bunch of other friends I had grown to find comfort in. I just don't have time anymore and Lo, like so many people before her, asked me when I had time to breathe. It's so weird to think that I'm always busy, and yet, I feel like I'm doing absolutely nothing and going absolutely nowhere. I know that I want to do travel journalism, but that requires having no roots anywhere, esp. with the kind that I would like to do. This makes me uneasy, though, because that's what I've always wanted: a constant. Choosing that kind of career, however, would eliminate any hope for that.

Calvin Trillin came to lecture at UCI last night and I went after SPOP training. Oh yeah, I'm doing it again this year. It's a lot less wonderment and a lot more worry-- about making it a good experience for the 1st years, all the time and money you have to put in to plan events and retreats, all the workshops you have to plan for your spop families, etc. I'm also Vice President Education for AXO now and we picked up a small Spring 08 pledge class, so that's more time out of my week. Quality over quantity, but man are these girls a handful. They're going to do great things and be great people, though, and that's all that matters.

I feel like I've been walking around with a giant hole in my chest and it's not a good feeling. I went from that weird high on life to this extreme low. I need to get out of it.

There's no time to be sad.